Cloaked in Gray
by Scarletinii
Summary: Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control.
1. Chapter 1

STORY: Cloaked in Gray

AUTHOR: Scarletinii

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Castle.

**PART ONE**

_It took her a daunting thirty-storey drop to realize she needed him, a torrential downpour to realize she wanted him, and a relentless ache to realize she just couldn't take it anymore._

**CHAPTER ONE**

It was still raining. The lightening strike was brilliant as it illuminated Castle's sleeping form. His arm hung limply over Kate's torso as a rumble of thunder shook her gently. She silently counted the seconds separating each boom of thunder as the storm approached. It seemed that even Mother Nature needed a good rebellion every once and a while.

Even amongst the chaos, a mere three hours ago, the storm was barely a blip on her radar.

Kate slipped silently out of Castle's embrace and she plucked her undergarments from the floor, slipping them on hastily. Her clothing was still damp as she scooped the garments up off the floor. She folded them neatly on a chair and instead slipped Castle's shirt on and buttoned it up.

Kate sat at the edge of his bed staring out the window. It was late, very late, but the idea of closing her eyes terrified her. She almost died less than five hours ago and she wasn't keen on reliving it. Her life had been in jeopardy many times before this but this time it was different.

This time she had something to lose.

She looked over her shoulder at Castle, who despite her inner turmoil, was still sound asleep. She confessed her feelings to him tonight; she told him that she wanted him, that he was the only thing she could think about in what could have been her last moments.

He saw her scar for the first time tonight. She placed his hand over top of it and he felt the ribbed skin below his touch.

When her fingers relinquished her hold on his, they both flashed back to Roy Montgomery's tribute. The day when the shot rang out and Kate hit the ground under the force of Castle's attempt to save her. He told her he loved her that day, milliseconds before she lost consciousness, she heard his heartfelt confession.

Kate winced as she pushed herself off the bed and headed into the bathroom connected to his bedroom. Her adrenaline was finally wearing off and her body was beginning to ache. A bruise was taking form on her forearm where Ryan and her comrades had taken hold.

She caught a glimpse of her disheveled appearance in the mirror when she turned on the bathroom light. Her aching arms protested as she unbuttoned Castle's shirt revealing a purpling bruise along her ribcage. She could almost feel the impact of her attacker's knee slamming into her abdomen before she crashed down into the concrete below.

Her throat burned where his hands held her tight, her jaw ached where his fist connected, and her back throbbed where it struck concrete, but her pride took the largest hit when she realized that this was a battle that she wasn't going to win.

He was going to leave her to die.

And Castle wasn't coming.

When she sat in the rain that night she cried as she relived the events on that rooftop. She cried for the pain she endured, she cried for the fear she felt, and she cried for the love she harbored.

Castle's voice echoed painfully in her ears.

_Four years I've been right here…_

_Waiting for you to just open your eyes and see that I've been right here…_

He poured his heart out to her, all his secrets and fears, but she pushed him away. She couldn't swallow her pride, at least that was what she told herself, but the truth was, she was afraid.

He told her he loved her for the second time tonight, it only took him a year to muster up the courage to say it again. This time without the threat of imminent death, he said the three words Kate feared most, twice.

As she drowned in the New York rainstorm all she could see was his face as he told her he wouldn't watch her throw her life away. She couldn't stop the hurt from setting in as he walked out of her life.

Unbeknownst to him, the heartbreak was shared by two.

She had never known love the way she loved him. She had never known love to cause this degree of emotional affliction. She had never known a single name to instigate a downward spiral of despair at mere mention.

She had never known someone quite like Richard Castle.

Her mother used to say that life never gave you anything that you couldn't handle.

If that was true then why was this case still consuming her?

If she continues to investigate her mother's murder she will die. If she dies Castle will feel responsible. If she dies her father will be alone. If she dies Roy Montgomery will have died in vain.

If she dies could she ever forgive herself?

All she knew for certain was that in the last moments, before her fingers lost their grip of the overhang, her only thoughts were of him.

Just him.

And she was taking it as a sign.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you for the reviews and follows. Very exciting and much appreciated.

**PART ONE**

_It took her a daunting thirty-storey drop to realize she needed him, a torrential downpour to realize she wanted him, and a relentless ache to realize she just couldn't take it anymore._

**CHAPTER TWO**

Kate took a deep breath and slipped Castle's button down all the way off her shoulders, allowing it to fall to the cool bathroom tile. The bruise below her sternum was by far the worst, but it certainly wasn't the only contusion causing her anguish. Her elbows, shoulder blades, and lower back had taken quite a beating, but the bruise forming on her jaw, and along her neck were her main concern.

She couldn't hide them.

He would see her marks soon enough. Even with her clothes on the detection will be inevitable. But at least they would fade.

Unfortunately, not every injury rendered her so lucky.

Her hand fell to the scar between her breasts, for a mark so minor, it sure caused a lot of damage. She turned slightly on her heel to take in the long scar along her left side where her heart was, not so long ago, painfully on display.

She was rushed into emergency surgery that day, there was no time for a plastic surgeon, there was no time to ensure that her body would maintain its original appearance, there was no way to hide the surgical damage.

Castle was prepared for the bullet entry wound when they had entered his bedroom, but the long incision scar along her left side almost sent him over the edge. Suddenly he couldn't have her fast enough, his lips trailed down her body only to stop on the uneven contour that wrapped intrusively along her rib cage.

He was upset. He could see the damage he had caused; he could see the true consequences of his actions. He pushed her to pursue her mother's case and she almost paid for it with her life.

His feelings were irrational; he knew he didn't pull the trigger.

But did he load the gun?

His lips were warm against her skin as he kissed along the entirety of her scar. She could feel his fingers stiffen against her waist as she shivered violently against the chill from her rain soaked clothing.

She ran her hand slowly along his cheek, "Castle," she whispered. "I'm cold."

What started off in desperation, slowly faded to something neither could deny. There was no pressure. There were no expectations. Doubt and uncertainty were forgotten as they finally succumbed to their inevitable.

They made love.

Twice.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you for the amazing reviews! Here is the third installment, and at the request of Thecastlefan101, it is a little bit longer. :) Thank you for reading!

**PART ONE**

_It took her a daunting thirty-storey drop to realize she needed him, a torrential downpour to realize she wanted him, and a relentless ache to realize she just couldn't take it anymore._

**CHAPTER THREE**

The lighting in the bathroom flickered against the intensity of the growing storm. Kate unsuccessfully smoothed her unruly curls before trying to tuck them away behind her ears. What little that was left of her mascara had collected beneath her eyes and remained there despite her eradication methods.

Her vigorous attempts did nothing more than intensify the look of the bags under her incredibly tired eyes.

She hadn't slept in what felt like weeks. Of course that wasn't true, but she certainly hadn't slept _well _in what felt like weeks. It started when Castle began to pull away from her. It started when his ostentatious arrival to her crime scene included a beautiful blonde companion. It started when she realized she might have waited too long.

But she wasn't ready to let go.

So she did the only thing that she could think of; she gave him hope. She gave them hope, possibly in the most unorthodox of ways. He stood before her dressed in a tattered zombie walk costume, complete with complementary degenerative horror make-up. She told him that her wall was coming down, and he told her he wanted to be around when it did.

She wanted that too.

But things change. Things changed when the violent photograph requisition from the Montgomery home shook the precinct. Things changed when Castle revealed his motives behind keeping her mother's case cold. Things changed when he accused her of lying to him about that day in the cemetery.

Suddenly all bets were off. Suddenly he wasn't willing to give her time; suddenly he wasn't willing to wait. And in an outrage induced outburst he put it all on the line.

Everything.

But she was unwilling to admit reciprocation.

And she wasn't sure if he would ever forgive her for that.

Kate pulled a deep purple washcloth from the bottom drawer beneath the bathroom sink. She ran the cloth under the stream of warm water and pressed the cloth gently against the abrasions along her left shoulder blade. Pain surged through her forearm as she strained to relocate the cloth to each of the contusions.

She couldn't help but feel broken. She had been through a lot, not just tonight, but as a whole. She was shot in the heart and she survived. She was locked in a frozen cargo hold and made it through. She almost drowned in her own squad car but he got her out. Hell, she was almost tiger food.

"Kate."

His voice came from the doorway as she turned to face him. Her damage was on display for him. And as he saw her in all her modesty, clad in bruises and contusions, his face said it all.

Frustration. Guilt. Anger.

He tore his eyes from her as he approached the medicine cabinet. He pulled out a small first aid kit and propped it open against the dark tile. He took the cloth from her and ran it under the warm water again, ringing it out generously before dabbing gently at her raw skin.

He applied an antiseptic cream, he adhered the bandages, but he didn't speak. He couldn't find the words, after seeing her injuries he wasn't sure if he wanted to know the details, he wasn't sure if he could handle them.

He lifted his crumpled shirt from the floor and handed it back to her. She pulled it on slowly and fumbled with the buttons as Castle ran his fingers along the pale purple markings on her neck. His fingers were soon replaced with his lips as he kissed along her neck soothingly only to stop against her jaw line where Maddox had struck her.

"It's okay, Castle," she soothed, her fingers gently caressing the terry cloth material of his housecoat. "It doesn't hurt."

The material slipped roughly from her grasp as he pulled back and out of her reach.

"Liar," he whispered.

But he wasn't talking about today.

Because she was a liar long before today.

And he knew it.

She hated the fact that she couldn't open up to him. She hated the fact that she wasn't strong enough to be vulnerable in front of him. She hated the fact that she was so damn scared.

And the fixation of his big blue eyes on her was not helping.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: It has been a while! Sorry for the delay, but here is a little Castle perspective.

**PART ONE**

_It took her a daunting thirty-storey drop to realize she needed him, a torrential downpour to realize she wanted him, and a relentless ache to realize she just couldn't take it anymore._

**CHAPTER FOUR**

The look on his face when she couldn't offer him the explanation he deserved broke her heart. He was upset with her, hell, she was upset with herself but oddly enough that didn't instill the confidence she so desperately desired.

When Castle finally broke the silence, his words were barely above a whisper, "Kate, was this a mistake?"

His words stung. He meant them to. He needed to know that tonight meant just as much to her as it did to him. He needed to know that this wasn't just a one-time thing. He needed to know that they had a chance.

When she knocked on his door tonight he was so angry with her. He wanted nothing more than to hurt her feelings and slam the door in her face. But she was cold, and she was sorry and she was kissing him.

And he loved her.

"Are you giving me an out?" Kate asked him quietly.

He nodded.

He needed to know how she felt about him. He needed to hear the words. He wanted a relationship with her, he wanted to wake up next to her in the morning and he wanted to go home with her at night. He wanted everything with her.

But he needed it all. He can't sleep with her and not want more, he can't kiss her and not want more, he can't work with her and not want more.

He will always want more with her.

Always.

"Castle, I don't want an out."

"No?" he asks.

He may have wanted her, he may have loved her, but he was not above torturing her. She kissed him, she started this, and if she wanted it over he was giving her an out. But if she wanted him, she was going to have to say it.

But she remained silent.

Frustratingly mute.

But she did shake her head.

"I'm sorry you're hurting." he offered quietly.

But he wasn't talking about her bruises, or the way she was favoring her left side, or even the way she was barely keeping herself upright on her unsteady legs. He was talking about her heart, because that was what took the real beating today. The man who killed her mother assaulted her. The man who shot her in the chest threw her off the side of a building. The man who walked free today drove her to his doorstep.

And he let her in.

She looked tired. The knuckles on her left hand were white from their tight grip on his towel rack. He wasn't sure if it was the stress of the situation or a true belief that she would actually fall over without the support. He wanted nothing more than to pull her towards him, kiss her senseless and help her forget.

But he was selfish.

He needed to know.

"Why don't you want an out?"

She shot him a look. Even masked by incredibly tired and red-rimmed eyes it was unmistakable. It was the look she saved for him and him alone. It was the look he got when he wouldn't stay in the car, or when he fed the birds with her boys, and especially when he suggested an alien as the perpetrator. It was the look he got when she thought he was being an idiot.

She thought he was being an idiot.

And in that moment it was enough.


	5. Chapter 5

**PART ONE**

_It took her a daunting thirty-storey drop to realize she needed him, a torrential downpour to realize she wanted him, and a relentless ache to realize she just couldn't take it anymore._

**CHAPTER FIVE**

He deserved so much better than her. He really did. He was warm and he was gentle and he had so much more to give than she could ever hope to offer. He loved her on pure faith. On hope that one day she would see him the way that he saw her.

She ran her thumb over the knuckle of the hand curled protectively around her bare and aching rib. She wanted to believe that this was real. She wanted to believe that his love for her would always be as strong as it was at this moment.

She wanted to believe that she wasn't crazy for loving him back.

She fell for him long before she was willing to admit it to herself. The tears that fell after Castle left with Gina for the summer were not about him, the summer of silence did not hurt her feelings, and his empty chair was not a painful reminder.

The longer she denied her feelings the more it hurt.

She almost told him on that day in the frozen cargo hold. She had been shivering so violently that she had just slid down the iced wall to the frigid floor below. He had wasted no time joining her and without permission wrapped himself around her. He had tried to keep her tremors away but the temperature was just too cold.

She remembered starting a sentence. She remembered intending to tell him how she felt about him, but the words never passed her lips. Her hand fell from his face and she succumbed to the unbearable chill.

She had almost showed him that night in Los Angeles. Had he not went into his bedroom; things may have turned out differently.

But then she was shot and everything went to hell.

She was too broken to love, too damaged to be loved, and she hurt the man she could one day see as her love.

He forgave her and she didn't deserve it.

She was still broken. She was still working to be better. She had picked herself up off the floor, dusted off the debris and tried to hold it together. But the bandages were tearing, and her bruises were throbbing, her lungs were constricted and her heart was cold.

But he wasn't.

Tonight when he asked her if this was a mistake, she wanted to say yes. The implications of the truth terrified her. He scared her. The feelings she felt for him, the feelings she felt when she was with him, and especially the feelings she felt when he wasn't around.

It was terrifying.

There were so many things that she still needed to tell him, there were so many things that he still deserved to hear. And it was about time that she was brave.

"Castle?" she whispered into the darkness.

He mumbled a response, incoherent, but conscious.

"I want to tell you something," she started. " I know that you already know this, but you deserve to hear it from me."

She took in a long shaky breath. "I remember everything. I remember feeling the bullet tear through my chest, I remember you trying to save me, I remember you begging me to stay with you, and I remember you telling me that you love me."

She exhaled a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"When you came into the hospital that day you asked me if I remembered what had happened and I lied to you. But it wasn't because I didn't want you to say it, or that I didn't want you to feel it, or even that I didn't feel the same way, it was just too much."

She waited for a response, not necessarily verbal, but a movement, or anything to assure her that he was still conscious.

"I had convinced myself that I was saving you the embarrassment of having to take your words back. It was easier to believe that it was a mistake."

Silence.

"I was so broken. I had a hole in my heart and it hurt to breathe. I was so terrified that summer. I was hidden away in a cabin in the middle of nowhere and I was still afraid to go outside. I could barely pull myself out of bed in the morning and I needed my dad to sit with me each night. I couldn't fall asleep alone and when I did sleep I relived that day over and over. I would feel the bullet and then I would see your face."

Silence.

"I wanted to call. I wanted to hear your voice. I wanted you to tell me it would be okay, but I couldn't have you see me like that." A stray tear slid down her cheek. "I wanted you so badly, I wanted to lose myself in you, I wanted you to take away my pain, and you would have."

He would have done anything for her. He would have picked her up off the floor and he would have put her right back on top of her pedestal. She would always be atop a pedestal in his eyes.

And she was grateful for that.

"You would have," she repeated quietly, "and we wouldn't have made it, Castle, and I want us to make it."

Her tears were openly betraying her now. They were coming out far quicker than she was able to eradicate them.

She had been so selfish. She had run and she had hid. And maybe she had an excuse, maybe her actions were justified because she was hurting, but he was hurting too. And there was no excuse for that.

"I never meant to hurt you," her words came out in a strangled whisper. "I'm so sorry."

Silence.

"Castle," she whispered. "Are you there?"

"I'm here," he said.

A tormented sob escaped past her lips.

He flipped her over effortlessly. Bringing her closer to him and pressing his forehead to hers. "Please don't cry, Kate," he pleaded. She longed for his comfort. She wanted nothing more than to hide her face away in the crook of his neck and cry until she was all out of his tears. But she couldn't do that.

So she swallowed down a painful sob and fought like hell to keep every inch of herself from trembling.

"Thank you for telling me."

She had been holding it in for so long. She had been living a lie for so long. She had been letting him down for so long. It felt good to finally speak the truth.

"Thank you for waiting for me, Castle," she whispered.

"Anytime Kate Beckett."


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: All right, so I am turning this into a full-blown story! I am going to consider the last five chapters my prologue because the style of writing changes as it actually develops some plot. Here is the first chapter of part two, it is the morning after, but it doesn't go quite as planned.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Castle.

**PART TWO**

_Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control. _

**CHAPTER SIX**

It was _still_ raining. Kate pulled her jacket tighter around her shoulders as she maneuvered her way through the umbrella-toting pedestrians cluttering the sidewalk. She didn't even bother avoiding the puddles; her shoes were already ruined and soaked through.

Her hood hung low over her forehead as she pushed forward through the crowd. She was freezing, her trembling fingers pushed deeper into the damp pockets of her jacket, but despite the chill, she couldn't force the smile from her face.

She woke up in Castle's arms this morning.

Richard Castle.

He had discovered her tattoo this morning. He had claimed that she couldn't tease him with such information and not expect him to thoroughly investigate when the opportunity arose.

Martha had discovered them this morning. She had come home early to retrieve her script for rehearsal and had found Kate hidden behind her son in the kitchen, dressed only in his button down shirt.

Martha didn't let her off the hook.

_Good morning, Katherine._

She had been careful to keep the majority of her indisposed flesh hidden behind Castle's body before she peeked her head out from behind his arm to give Martha a warm greeting.

There was humiliation and then there was kitchen nudity involving the mother of the man you did ridiculously inappropriate things to the night before.

_Castle, your mother is here and she knows we had sex, and I would very much like to vacate the premises before Alexis arrives and comes to the same conclusion. There is only so much embarrassment one person can stand. _

He had pouted until she insisted that he spend the night at her place tonight.

He was so easy.

The doorman to her building opened the door as she hurried into the warmth. She thanked the man before shrugging off her drenched jacket and heading up to her apartment.

She discarded her stilettos and dropped her jacket onto the back of one of her kitchen chairs before making her way to her bedroom.

A floorboard creaked, only she hadn't moved. She reached for the weapon she no longer possessed but she was struck between the shoulder blades with a blunt object before her fingers could reach her empty ankle holster.

She was up before he had the chance to strike her again. His elbow collided with her glass vase and it toppled from her dresser and shattered against the floor below. He took hold of her left arm firmly and wrenched her body back to the ground. He was fast, much faster than she was.

"Stay down," he hissed.

Kate was on her stomach. She gritted her teeth against the searing pain as she tried to push herself up and out of the glass. Her left side slumped slightly as she realized one of her wrists had struck the ground at a most unfortunate angle.

A strong shoe came firmly down onto her back, forcing her against the floor, and easing the glass into her vulnerable flesh. "I said stay down, Detective"

"Who are you?" she spat.

His foot held her in place as he threw open a few of the adjacent drawers of her dresser, feeling for a concealed weapon. "You armed?"

She tried to move her head to get a look at her attacker, but he held her firmly in place. Grunting quietly she adjusted her injured wrist carefully below the hipbone that trapped it. "I asked you first."

The shoe pressed her painfully taut against the floor, grinding his toe directly into his point of attack. "Are you armed?" he repeated.

"No," she gritted out.

"Good, now sit up," he commanded removing his foot.

She painfully positioned her wrists once again and pushed herself up carefully into a sitting position. Kate winced against the shard of glass protruding from the forearm of her uninjured wrist. She leaned slightly to the right in an inane attempt to alleviate the pain in her midsection and she rested her feeble wrist against her thigh.

Her attacker had his revolver trained on her.

He was tall. He had a stocky build and was dressed in jeans and a hooded sweatshirt. His hair was cut short, his beard was long and unkempt and he looked no older than forty. She glared up at him as his dark eyes surveyed the damage he had caused.

"Who are you?" she asked again.

"A friend," he replied simply.

"A friend?"

He nodded. "There's a price on your head. As of eight o'clock this morning a three million dollar bounty has been offered to anyone who can kill Katherine Houghton Beckett."

"And that's why you're here? To claim your prize?"

"I just told you I was a friend, don't you listen?" he snapped at her.

"Then what are you doing here?" she shot back.

"I'm here to warn you."

"Why?"

"Because what happened to your mother was uncalled for, and once upon a time she protected my favorite thing, so I am going to return the favor."

"You knew my mom?" Kate asked quietly.

He ignored her question. "Get out of the city, Detective, because they are coming, and they will not stop until you're dead."

"Who hired you?"

"Someone you will never touch."

"What happens when he finds out you let me live?"

"He won't," he stated simply.

He tucked his gun into the waistband of his jeans and shoved her back into the glass and onto her knees. His knee pressed securely into the slant along her spine as he held her uninjured wrist tightly to her chest and slammed the other against the hard surface below. She cried out as he relinquished control of her body and she cradled her now broken wrist against her chest.

He beat her. He trashed her apartment. He caused himself some pretty severe self-inflicted wounds before he left her bloody and bruised on her bedroom floor.

Kate gasped for air as she struggled to roll herself out of the mess of glass. She pushed the offending tendrils of hair from her face with her ruined fingertips. Her skin burned as she pulled herself up off of the floor. Her wounds were full of glass and if she wasn't convinced before, she was certain now, at least one of her ribs were fractured.

Her cell phone was still securely located in the back pocket of her jeans. Her screen was smashed now. She smeared her uneven screen with blood as she dragged her finger across the unlock surface. The contact button hesitated as she struck it repeatedly. When she found the Twelfth Precinct she pressed her finger against the call button and placed the device to her ear.

It rang as she curled herself up atop her comforter and closed her eyes to wait.

A/N: Be prepared for some serious angst in the upcoming chapters and as always, reviews are wonderful. Thank you for reading!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks to all the followers, reviewers, and readers!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Castle.

**PART TWO**

_Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control. _

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

Castle buttoned up his clean navy blue button down and cuffed the sleeves. He fastened his belt and slipped on his watch. He hung his damp towel on the back of the bathroom door and he ran his hand through his freshly coiffed hair.

His shower wasn't quite as enjoyable as it should have been, but the lovely detective's reaction to the unfortunate interruption was well worth the solitary cleanse. Kate had inquired about his mother's well-being and she just couldn't help herself.

_Not as good as you, darling. _

Kate fled the premises not long after that.

She was so cute when she was embarrassed.

Kate had barely been gone an hour and he already missed her. He missed the way her skin flushed under his touch, or the way he could draw a whimper from her lips with a simple kiss, or the way she lingered in his embrace just long enough to let him know that she was doing it on purpose.

Good God, was it tonight yet?

He headed into the kitchen and placed he and Kate's empty coffee mugs into the sink. Castle pulled open a few drawers and opened a few cupboards as he started to assemble the ingredients for pancakes. There was nothing like chocolate chip pancakes to start the day off right.

Not that this particular day required pancakes, but they were Alexis' favorite and she would be home any minute.

He splashed quite a liberal amount of flour onto his apron as he stirred in the milk and the eggs. His chocolate chip supply was a little on the low side but he believed there may be a small stash of Hershey's Kisses in his office.

Now that would be delicious, especially since they were infused with caramel.

Castle heard his front door open. "Welcome home my child," he announced loudly.

Alexis dropped her bag onto the floor. "Hi dad," she replied. The young red head removed her rain soaked jacket and climbed atop one of the three black stools along the kitchen island. She rested her forearms against the counter and placed her chin atop her overlapped hands.

"How was your night?" he asked her.

"Long," she sighed, "but I had a lot of fun."

"Alcoholic fun?"

"Maybe a little," she admitted.

Castle shook his head in mock disapproval before he poured a large spoonful of batter into the sizzling pan. He pulled a clean spoon from the drawer and took a generous scoop of uncooked batter and held it out to her. "Your punishment," he stated, gesturing towards the spoon.

"Gross, dad. Can't you just ground me like a normal parent?"

Castle shook his head. "If you're going to tweet about the unfairness of my punishments, I at least want to give your followers a good laugh."

"Isn't force feeding me uncooked ingredients some form of child abuse?"

"Not in the state of New York," he replied.

Alexis rolled her eyes before pointing to the stovetop. "Your pancake is burning."

Castle's eyes flashed down to their breakfast and wedged his spatula beneath the pancake before flipping it rapidly onto its' uncooked side. "Crisis averted," he announced with a resounding slap to the counter.

He spun on his heel and tapped his cooking utensil against the frying pan before proceeding to demonstrate a few dreadful dance moves in the middle of the kitchen.

"What's with you today, dad?"

Castle grinned at his daughter and slid his spatula beneath his now cooked chocolate masterpiece and flipped it onto Alexis' plate with a dramatic knee bend - foot raise combination. "I'm happy."

"I can see that," she laughed. "Any particular reason?"

He paused and set his spatula down on the counter. "Alexis, I want to ask you something."

"What?" she asked with a mouthful of pancake.

"How would you feel if Kate and I began dating?"

Alexis frowned and looked up at her father. "You're dating Detective Beckett?"

"There is a very strong possibility."

She looked back down at her breakfast before she responded. "Dad, you don't need my permission."

"I know that, but I want your opinion."

"I wouldn't like it," Alexis stated quietly.

"You don't like Kate?"

Alexis looked back up at her father. "I don't like what she does to you."

"What does that mean?" he asked.

His daughter sighed. "It means that regardless of how she makes you feel now, I remember how she made you feel then, and maybe you can forgive her for that, but I can't. It's not that I don't like her, it's just that for the past four years I have been the daughter of a cop. I now have to worry about you chasing down dangerous criminals, or getting locked in frozen cargo holds, or getting trapped in cars at the bottom of rivers. Dad, you've almost died, and I can't help but think that if it wasn't for her, you wouldn't end up in those situations."

"Alexis, I chose to take those risks."

"Why?" she demanded. "Why do you put yourself in unnecessary danger? I don't think your research requires that much dedication."

"I'm helping people."

Alexis sighed again."What makes you think this relationship will even work? None of your others have."

It was Castle's turn to sigh. "Kate's different."

"Why?"

"Because she's… she's real."

Alexis rolled her eyes. "There's a lot of real woman out there, dad, ones that don't hurt you for months on end while they date other men, or abandon you for an entire summer while they hide from their problems, or lie to you because they are too afraid to face the truth."Alexis paused. "You do remember how much she's hurt you, right?"

"She's been hurt by me too."

"Is that supposed to make it better?"

"Of course not, but I need you to know that she's not the only one to blame."

"You wanted my opinion, dad, I'm sorry if it's not what you wanted to hear," she replied before she pushed away the plate of her half eaten pancake and removed herself from the stool.

"Pumpkin, I lo–" he started.

"You love her," Alexis interrupted, "I know, and believe me when I say I'm glad there is even more reason for you to get hurt in the line of her duty."

He watched as his teary eyed daughter disappeared angrily up the stairwell. Castle sighed as he heard the harsh clicks of her shoes down the hallway before the resonant slam of her bedroom door.

She was right; he did love her, but that particular sentiment wasn't meant for Kate.

He tossed his wooden spoon into the sink and poured the remainder of the uncooked batter down his garbage disposal. He turned on the hot water and all evidence of their breakfast washed away.

Oh, Alexis.

He sulked back to his bedroom and flopped face down onto his unmade bed. Was he a bad father? His daughter had been hurting for quite some time now, and he hadn't noticed. Of course he knew she worried, but not enough to warrant such an outburst. Perhaps his NYPD involvement was selfish, maybe Alexis was right, but when he helped catch a killer roaming the streets his daughter frequented, it didn't feel selfish.

His nose was pressed deeply into one of his pillows and he groaned when the phone in the back pocket of his jeans began to vibrate. He reached backwards into his denim pocket and pulled out the offending device.

"Castle," he mumbled into the mouthpiece.

"Castle, it's Ryan," the detective began. "Listen, Beckett's okay, but something's happened."

Castle was off his bed, in his jacket, and out the door before Ryan could even tell him which Hospital.

A/N: Castle and Beckett are next! Thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

**PART TWO**

_Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control. _

**CHAPTER EIGHT **

Ryan hadn't given him much information over the phone, so he had very little idea what to expect when he came barreling into her hospital wing. The elevator ride up to her floor had felt like an eternity and when the doors finally did crawl open, he couldn't help himself.

He ran.

After he rounded his third corner he encountered two large uniforms standing resolute outside a door at the end of the hallway. It was Kate's room, it had to be. When he approached the guards they refused him access until he presented them with a legitimate form of identification.

They wouldn't even confirm if it was her room or not until he did.

He scrambled to get his wallet from his back pocket and fumbled for a Driver's License that refused to leave its' plastic sleeve. In the end he held his open wallet up to his face and awaited their decision.

The heftier of the two uniforms delivered two knocks, pushed open the heavy wooden door, and stepped aside. Castle took a hesitant step into the room and approached the pale blue curtain that surrounded the bed within.

He hesitated when the fabric rustled and Captain Gates emerged from behind the flimsy veil, her arms crossed tightly to her chest.

She didn't look pleased to see him.

"Sir," he greeted her quietly. "Can I see her, please?"

After a moment of contemplation her eyes softened uncharacteristically and she glanced over her shoulder to get approval from the woman behind her. Kate spoke her consent and Gates stepped to the side.

He crossed the threshold and his eyes fell immediately to his partner.

"Hey, Castle" she croaked.

Her cheeks were stained with tears, and if it weren't for the streaked smear of blood beneath her left eye, it would have been indiscernible. His eyes drifted to her abused arms. Her left arm was struggling to keep her right immobilized and he could tell by the look of determination on her face that she was fighting against a lip that wanted to tremble.

"Hi," he whispered back.

There was a chair next to her bed. Her boots sat beneath the seat and a small pool of sludge tainted the floor beneath the soles. Her clothes weren't there; the paramedics had cut her out of the garments in the ambulance and even with the assistance of the large scissors, the fabric had clung painfully to her lesions.

She was beginning to feel uncomfortable under his scrutiny and her eyes fell from his.

Without preamble he reached for the chair, dragged it as close to her as possible, and sat down.

Her eyes found his again. Her hair was matted and a few strands hung intrusively over her eye and clung to the dried blood coating her cheek. He reached forward and gently freed the piece of hair before tucking it behind her ear.

Gates cleared her throat.

Castle dropped his hand and both he and Kate looked up to see her physician emerging from behind the curtain. He was dressed in emerald green scrubs and was carting a gray medical supply kit. The young doctor had been forced to wait over an hour to treat his patient and judging by the look on his face, he wasn't planning to wait a moment more.

Infection scared Doctor Bennett more than Victoria Gates ever could.

"I need to do a quick examination and then I really should flush out your wounds and get you stitched up before you go down to radiology. Trust me, you're going to want that glass out before you get your wrist x-rayed."

Kate nodded and Doctor Bennett dropped his carrier onto the counter next to the sink. "I don't think she requires an audience," he said sternly, without making any specific eye contact.

Gates sighed and shoved her cell phone into the back pocket of her slacks. She collected a few stray pieces of paper and stuffed them into her leather bag before sliding the zipper closed and hoisting it onto her shoulder. "Mister Castle?" she called out to the absentminded author.

He looked up at the sound of his name. "What?" he asked.

She raised an eyebrow.

"What?" he repeated, confused.

"Get up," she commanded with an upward jerk of her chin. "We need to wait in the hallway."

"Oh," he said nodding and he pushed himself out of his chair.

Doctor Bennett returned to her bedside with some sterile equipment atop an adjustable metal table with wheels. He dispensed a sizable amount of sanitizer into his hands and rubbed them together before reaching for a pair of gloves.

Kate watched as her sullen partner began to follow Gates out of the room.

"Castle, wait," she called out. "Would you stay?"

Castle nodded and Gates left without objection.

Her doctor snapped on his second glove before placing a hand on her shoulder. "Would you mind sitting forward so I can take a look at your back?"

"Okay," she agreed and the young doctor placed his other hand against her stomach before helping her bend forward. Her midsection burned fiercely at the new angle and she bit down on her already injured bottom lip.

Doctor Bennett reached behind her neck to untie the gown. The weightless material slipped down her arms and over her bra before landing softly in her lap. Goose flesh erupted all over her exposed skin and she struggled to remain upright despite the swell of pain behind her ribcage. She felt his hands travel lightly over the muscles in her back before he applied pressure to her berated shoulder blade. She rotated the joint at his request and he assured that she hadn't been struck hard enough to cause any permanent damage.

An angry purple mass of bruise spread along the right half of her midsection. He assisted her in lying back down and his trained fingers inspected each individual rib for any indication of a fracture or a break. He placed a heavy hand on each side of her abdomen and measured her resistance to pressure when she took a deep breath.

His strong arms adjusted her back up into a sitting position and he helped her swing her legs over the side of the bed. Her back was to Castle and he watched as his partner flinched against the cool metal of Doctor Bennett's stethoscope.

When he was finished he refastened her gown and told her that her ribs were fine but the bruising would require extensive bed rest to heal. She nodded and her doctor prepared a syringe of anesthetic before raising the metal table up a few notches and clicking it into place.

Her body trembled the moment she realized she would have to relinquish control of her broken wrist.

Castle came to the same realization.

"Here, Kate," Castle offered, "I'll hold it."

He removed his jacket and shoes and crawled onto the bed next to her. He wrapped an arm around her waist and carefully replaced her hand with his. Her arm was still slick with blood when his fingers closed gently around her feeble wrist.

"Thank you," she said quietly before placing her free hand onto the mobile table positioned just above her lap.

Her doctor worked quickly; a patch of skin was disinfected and the tip of the local anesthetic needle was eased into her aching arm. As he waited for the numbness to take effect he dipped a large cotton swab into Betadine and removed the blood from her cheek. It was a shallow cut but Doctor Bennett adhered a few narrow strips of bandage to the skin below her eye anyway.

He dispensed a few drops of petroleum jelly onto his finger and applied it generously to the split in her lip.

She leaned heavily into Castle's side. Her temple pressed to his jaw line as she watched her doctor remove each sliver of glass individually and flush each wound with a saline solution. There was a substantial amount of glass embedded in her arm and she couldn't help but wince at the depth in which the tip of the tweezers delved into the deep gashes of her forearm.

After a few more retrievals he began to suture the skin and wrap her arm in a white bandage from elbow to wrist. The glass in her other arm was minimal, but not enough so that a local anesthetic was unnecessary.

He followed the same procedure with this arm but instead of utilizing the table as his workplace he relied on Castle's steady hand.

Kate whimpered when the needle went in and Castle pressed his lips to her forehead.

The glass was removed, the wounds rinsed and sutured, but the bandages were left off in anticipation for a cast. He wrapped her cut up fingertips, collected his supplies and removed his gloves. He told her that someone would be by shortly to take her to radiology.

He left and they were alone.

She dropped her hand to the broken wrist in Castle's care and her fingers traced delicately along the raised skin of the slight bone protrusion.

"You can ask, you know," she offered quietly.

Castle shook his head. "I wouldn't want you to have to relive it."

A small smile tugged at her lips as her fingers tentatively entwined with his. "You really are very sweet, Castle," she said before settling deeper into his embrace.

A loud knock startled the pair and Kate drew back and dropped her hand from his. The door opened and after a few soft footsteps Lanie appeared from behind the curtain.

"Oh honey," she sighed as she dropped a small duffel bag at the foot of the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, Lanie," Kate responded automatically before attempting to take her miserable wrist back from her partner. He held her arm loosely to allow Kate to slip her hand into place.

"Please don't stop on my account," Lanie urged.

Castle drew his hand away and Kate readjusted her arm against her chest until she found the least painful position.

"I was just about to help her lie down," he explained before standing up.

He hadn't realized that his arm was covered in her blood.

His expression fell and he dropped his arm down to his side. Castle leaned over and slid his opposite hand beneath Kate's knees and helped her back up the bed. He reached for the blanket and draped it over her legs.

"Look," he began, "I have to go call Alexis. I kind of left without telling her where I was going and she's angry enough with me as it is. I saw a coffee stand downstairs on my way in. Have you eaten yet today? I was going to grab a bear claw, do you want one?"

"I'm not hungry."

"You should eat," he argued, "I'll get you one for later. Lanie, would you like one?"

"No thanks, sweetie," the ME replied.

"What about coffee? Do you want a coffee, Kate?"

"Castle," Kate pleaded softly. "Will you slow down a minute?"

"Yeah," he stammered. "Yeah, I'll stop. I'll go find somewhere to sit."

"You can sit in here," she offered.

"No, I shouldn't use my phone in a hospital. I'm going to go outside and call her and then I'll get you a bear claw, okay?"

She took a shaky breath and nodded. "Okay," she conceded sadly.

Both women watched as the writer collected his shoes, tossed his jacket over his shoulder, and hurried towards the door.

Kate's lip trembled the moment he disappeared behind the curtain.

"Oh Sweetie," Lanie sighed when they heard the door close. "Do you want me to drag that boy back in here?"

Kate shook her head, "No, it's okay, I think he needs a few minutes."

Lanie sat down on the bed next to her. "Did you tell him?"

"No," she replied, "I didn't tell him."

A/N: I debated whether or not to allow Castle to stick around for the trip to radiology or force him to scurry off into the far reaches of the hospital. I liked the idea of a cute apology scene so I chose the latter, but if it seems unrealistic that he would leave her side, I apologize. To be fair though, the poor guy is covered in her blood for the second time in a year, maybe he needs a little time to compose himself.

Let me know what you think. Reviews are a wonderful motivation. Thanks for reading!


	9. Chapter 9

**PART TWO**

_Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control._

**CHAPTER NINE**

Detective Ryan was in the hallway when Castle fled the room. He had his cell phone pressed to his ear and was too preoccupied to notice Castle scurry down the hallway and duck into the nearest restroom. The writer forced his arm beneath the motion sensitive faucet and the warm water erupted from the spout. He watched the sink fill with crimson as he haphazardly scrubbed at the blood coating his forearm.

He didn't stop scrubbing until long after the water ran clear.

_She's okay. She's okay. She's okay._

He gripped the edge of the sink and repeated the mantra over and over in his head.

_She's okay. She's okay. She's okay._

Only she wasn't.

Someone hurt her and he wasn't there.

Again.

He made his way back down to the lobby. Rain pounded against the windows as he headed towards the small coffee cart surrounded in chaos. Doctors and nurses lined up, one behind the other, awaiting a caffeine boost to get them through the rest of the day. An inexperience customer held up the line as he questioned the difference between a latte and a cappuccino and Castle decided it was best to wait until the line calmed down.

He headed into the gift shop instead and browsed the contents lining the festively painted walls. There was a rotating display of miniature TY Beanie Babies and he was drawn immediately to the monkey with the large purple eyes.

Her name was Coconut and he bought it for Kate.

The automated doors at the main entrance rolled open as he approached. He took a step out into the chilly air and pulled his cell phone out to make his call beneath the sheltered outdoor entryway.

His call went immediately to Alexis' voicemail.

Beep.

"Hi Pumpkin, it's dad. I just wanted to let you know that I am at the hospital with Kate; someone broke into her apartment this morning. She's okay, but I'm going to hang around here for a while. Give me a call back when you get this message. I love you Sweetie."

He clicked off his cell phone and tucked it into his jacket pocket. He headed back into the hospital and made his way to the coffee cart. The line was much shorter now and he got into position behind a gossipy group of maternity nurses.

He ordered two coffees. One for himself and one with two pumps of sugar free vanilla for Kate. There was only one bear claw left, so he selected it, and chose a slice of banana bread for himself.

He thanked the barista and took his tray of purchases, along with Coconut, and he plunked himself down at an unoccupied table.

God, he felt like a jerk.

She had wanted him to stay and he didn't.

He didn't deserve his banana bread.

Castle pushed his snack away and settled for a mouthful of the bitter coffee instead.

"Yo, Castle," he heard a familiar voice call from behind him. He turned around to see Javier Esposito jogging across the main floor lobby towards his table. "Nice monkey," he said before pulling up a chair.

Castle looked down at Coconut. "I bought it for Kate."

"How is she doing?" he asked as his chair screeched into position.

"Hurt," he replied, his voice thick with emotion. He ran his finger along the small tag attached to the ear of the stuffed monkey. "Somebody attacked her."

Esposito nodded solemnly. "I heard."

"He hit her."

"I know."

"He broke her wrist."

"I know."

Castle fell silent for a moment as he drew in a shaky breath. "I never should have let her leave this morning," he admitted quietly. "This is my fault."

Esposito shook his head. "This is _not_ your fault."

"If it wasn't for me she wouldn't be in that hospital bed."

"Listen to me," Esposito said firmly. "If it wasn't today, it would be tomorrow or the next day, this wasn't random, and you know that. I haven't read her statement and I don't know all the details, but what I do know is that I am grateful it happened today, and that she is in that hospital bed, because it could have been so much worse and until we know what our next move is, we need to hold onto that."

Castle swallowed hard.

"Today was a win, Castle, I know it doesn't seem that way, but trust me, it was a win."

It took him a moment but he managed to nod his head. "You're right," he conceded quietly.

Today_ was_ a win.

But would they be so lucky tomorrow?

Castle took a deep breath and brought his coffee cup up to his lips, and finished the last of the unpleasant liquid.

He grimaced as he swallowed down a substantial amount of coffee grounds.

He contemplated getting Kate her coffee elsewhere.

He knew she preferred Starbucks. He knew the overpriced spoil could earn him her most appreciative smile. A grateful T_hanks, Castle_ if it was a particularly early Monday. A hand squeeze if it was a really –

"So, you and Beckett huh?"

"Uh... wh- what?"

"You and Beckett," Esposito repeated. "You know... together."

"Us?" he squeaked. "No… we're not... no."

"No?" he asked as innocently as he could muster. "Then where exactly was she leaving from this morning?"

_Shit. Shit shit shit._

He wanted to accuse him of being insensitive, or cruel, but the truth was he would be doing the same thing if roles were reversed. Twisted minds think alike, and exposing a sexual encounter would be the epitome of distraction.

How was he going to explain this to Kate?

She was going to bludgeon him with her freshly casted arm and then verbally berate him from atop her hospital bed while he writhed in pain on the floor below.

She probably wouldn't kiss him again either.

This sucked.

"Please don't tell her I told you," he pleaded.

"Told me what?" he asked. "I haven't heard you admit to anything yet."

"Kate," he started. "Kate and I… we made love."

He regretted his choice of words the moment they left his mouth.

Esposito groaned loudly. "Gross, dude, was that really necessary? You can't just say she's your girlfriend?"

"I don't know if she is or not," he replied defensively. "We haven't had a chance to discuss it yet. I mean we talked but... I don't know."

Esposito smiled. "Go ask her to be your girlfriend, Castle," he teased. "She'll say yes, you'll... shake hands and everything will be right with the world."

Castle sighed.

He wished that were true.

He could falsify hope, he could put on his most convincing smile, but Kate would see right through him.

Because everything was not right with the world.

Someone attacked her.

Someone who wasn't Cole Maddox.

He was a writer; he didn't need to know all the details to piece together a story, especially this story; one he was so familiar with.

Someone else was hired to finish the job, and that terrified him.

He looked up to see Esposito watching him again.

Castle forced a smile and reached over to place Coconut and the bear claw carefully into the two empty holes of the coffee tray. "Would you mind taking these up to her?" he asked, pushing the tray towards him. "I need to give Alexis a call."

He lied. But Esposito didn't know that.

"Sure, bro," he replied. "I'll tell her you'll be up soon?"

"Yeah," he said nodding. "Soon."

Esposito picked up the tray of items and made his way to the elevators. He stood up as he watched the detective press the button and disappear behind the heavy metal doors.

Castle headed towards the stairwell and down to the basement. He found a secluded restroom to his left; he pushed open the door and he latched the rusting dead bolt.

He pressed his back against the door and dropped his head into his trembling hands.

And he cried.

_She must have been so scared._

A/N: Aw poor Castle. He's having a tough day! I really wanted Castle to slip up about Beckett and then Esposito to call him on it, so I hoped it seemed natural! Thanks for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: I apologize for being such a slow updater; my inspiration has been lacking lately and this chapter has been an absolute nightmare! I have been fighting with it for far too long so I hope you enjoy the finished product!

Thank you for sticking with me!

A LITTLE RECAP: Kate has been admitted into the hospital after being attacked in her apartment. Her attacker informed her there is a bounty on her head and advised her to get out of the city. Castle suspects something is wrong and when we left off, he was crying in an abandoned basement restroom.

Up next: Kate's return from radiology.

**PART TWO**

_Kate heard her wrist snap before she felt it, she could see the blood pooling beneath her skin as the fractured bone pressed against the surface. It hurt, but not nearly as much as the aftermath would. Her injury was a warning, a friendly reminder that she was not in control._

**CHAPTER TEN**

The basement had been cold.

Kate shivered in recollection as she raised her encased limb a few inches higher, allowing her nurse to maneuver the sling around her bulky cast. The fiberglass coating was sharp against the raw skin of her inner elbow and she winced as the rough material was crushed against her chest and secured into place.

"Sorry Hon', it needs to be tight."

The break in her wrist had been worse than they anticipated and it had taken one of the heftier orthopedic residents to jar the bone and snap it back into alignment.

Her wrist was still weeping.

She gritted her teeth as she felt the last strap tighten. Her nurse shifted her arm within the cradle, eased her elbow into the bend and tucked her fingers beneath the overlap.

Her hand fought for freedom the moment the nurse turned her back.

Lanie had frowned her way through the entire immobilization process. There had been a few not so subtle scoffs of disapproval and before the nurse could even get out the door, the medical examiner was already disassembling the harsh restraint.

Had the situation been different Kate may have laughed.

The constraint fell slack and her shoulder sagged in contentment. She rotated the distressed joint appreciatively and tossed the contraption aside. "Thanks, Lanie."

The ME smiled. "You're welcome, Sweetie."

Kate brought a leg up and tucked it beneath the other. She rested her cast across her lap, reached for some of the leftover cotton fluff and tucked a liberal amount beneath the sharp edge of the fiberglass. The detective massaged gently at her chafed skin and Lanie rummaged her way through the cupboards lining the wall.

The detective reached for the duffel bag at the foot of her bed and she dragged it across the sheets. She pulled open the zipper and removed a pair of athletic pants and a purple camisole.

She loosened the knot behind her neck and managed to rid herself of her gown.

Getting dressed was slightly more difficult.

The ME turned around to see Kate struggling with the straps of her top. The cotton snagged along the jagged edge of the cast and her neckline plunged salaciously. Lanie gasped, "Katherine Beckett, is that a hickey?"

"W-what?" she sputtered, tugging up the hem of the purple fabric. "No."

_Damnit, Castle._

"No?" the ME asked, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.

"No," she confirmed.

Lanie smiled. "Nice try, Sweetie, but _that_ –" she pointed out, directing an accusatory finger towards the offending mark, "- is most definitely a hickey... Castle gave that to you, didn't he?"

"No he didn't," she replied firmly, clasping a hand over her breast, "and it is not a hickey."

"Are you sure?"

"I think I would know, "she retorted.

Lanie took a deep breath and contemplated a different approach. "You know, Honey... if you did sleep with him –"

"I didn't."

"But if you did," she reiterated softly. "There would be no shame in it."

"I know that," Kate replied, sighing. "I... I wouldn't be ashamed I –"

A loud knock halted her mid sentence.

Her door opened and footsteps approached. "Knock Knock," a familiar voice called out.

Lanie sighed, placing a hand on her hip. "Come in, Javi."

He pushed the curtain aside and stepped into the room. He had a cardboard tray in one hand and a stuffed monkey in the other; he gave both women a smile and set the tray down on the bedside table. "How you feeling, boss?"

Kate frowned. "Better than you if that thing is for me," she replied sharply, nodding towards the stuffed animal.

He chuckled and tossed the purple-eyed creature into her lap. "Relax Beckett, it's from Castle."

"Oh," she replied, her tone softer. She stroked a few fingers along the chocolate fur and a soft smile tugged at her lips.

Esposito feigned shock. "Seriously?"

"What?"

He raised his eyebrows. "You were seconds away from throwing that damn thing back in my face but now that you know it's from your boy the monkey gets a smile and an ear scratch."

Kate pursed her lips; narrowing her eyes and fixing him with her best _you really wanna go there? _look.

Esposito raised both hands in mock surrender. "Hey," he laughed. "Don't give me that look, you know it's true."

She rolled her eyes. "Where is Castle?"

"Calling his kid," he replied, leaning against the wall next to Lanie. "Said he will be up soon."

The ME canted her head towards him. "Do you think you could go hurry _soon _along?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me, Chica?"

"Mmmhmm," she hummed, elongating each _m_, "and don't come back without a writer monkey."

"So bossy," he replied, pushing off the wall. "I like it."

He fled the room before she had the chance to react.

Lanie unfolded the triangle bandages she swiped from the medical supply cupboard and sat on the bed next to Kate. The detective offered her arm and Lanie wrapped the bandage around her cast, tied it behind her neck and knotted some excess material at her elbow. "Does that feel okay?" she asked.

Kate nodded solemnly.

"Are_ you_ okay?"

Kate drew in a shaky breath. "I _did_ sleep with Castle," she admitted softly, her voice breaking. "I'm not ashamed… I could never be ashamed, but I..." She rubbed at her watery eyes with the back of her hand. "I regret it."

Lanie took a deep breath and shook her head. "I don't think you do, Honey."

Kate's heart clenched.

Her shoulders slumped and her head fell forward. "What am I supposed to say to him, Lanie?" she asked, almost desperately. "I have to leave… and I can't ask him to wait."

The ME sighed. "Sweetie, he would wait for you even if you didn't ask."

_But should he have to?_

A/N: Kate and Castle are next! I'm quite happy with the next chapter's outline thus far, so follow, review or do absolutely nothing at all, but at least have faith in Beckett, because she may just surprise you. Thank you for reading!


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